I now have a photo album on facebook dedicated to pictures of unfinished work, stuff I'm currently working on etc - before the finished work ends up on the web site.
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=170274&l=7e579&id=838195173
Enjoy!
Friday, November 14, 2008
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Positive news
Lo and behold, for the first time in the history of this blog I won't complain or whine about things...
A few days ago I finally managed to build up enough confidence to volunteer to exhibit my work at a gallery connected to the school. I only have three paintings (well, make that two, I'm still working on the third) so I'll have to be joined by several others. I don't know how many have volunteered yet but I hope it'll all work out. If nothing comes out of it at least I'll know I dared to volunteer in the first place.
I finished a painting yesterday that I hope to include in the exhibition and I will add it to the website by the end of the week hopefully.
A few days ago I finally managed to build up enough confidence to volunteer to exhibit my work at a gallery connected to the school. I only have three paintings (well, make that two, I'm still working on the third) so I'll have to be joined by several others. I don't know how many have volunteered yet but I hope it'll all work out. If nothing comes out of it at least I'll know I dared to volunteer in the first place.
I finished a painting yesterday that I hope to include in the exhibition and I will add it to the website by the end of the week hopefully.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
It had to happen at some point...
...I had an idea. I worked on it for nearly two months: I struggled, I lost track of what I was doing, I found my way again, struggled some more and eventually it all plummeted.
Some ideas are obviously not meant to be.
You don't need to be a brain surgeon to figure that out, to know that you won't succeed in every little thing in life, but still - when I realised that what I had been working on for the past few months was never going to result in anything, I was very disappointed.
Ok, I was depressed, I'll admit that. I felt like I'd practically wasted my time and that nothing I ever did would turn out well.
But a few days ago I actually had several new ideas, started sketching right away and I'll start working on this new project this week. I'm actually very positive about this, which surprised me cause I'm the self-proclaimed queen of negativity (if you don't believe me, read my oldest blog posts.....) I really thought that the failed project would have a bigger impact on me. Let's see how long I can keep this positivity up..
By the way, I'm working on updating my web site too, only I had to rebuild it in Dreamweaver (which I've never used before) so it's a little harder than expected. But I'm almost finished so watch out for it in the coming weeks!
Some ideas are obviously not meant to be.
You don't need to be a brain surgeon to figure that out, to know that you won't succeed in every little thing in life, but still - when I realised that what I had been working on for the past few months was never going to result in anything, I was very disappointed.
Ok, I was depressed, I'll admit that. I felt like I'd practically wasted my time and that nothing I ever did would turn out well.
But a few days ago I actually had several new ideas, started sketching right away and I'll start working on this new project this week. I'm actually very positive about this, which surprised me cause I'm the self-proclaimed queen of negativity (if you don't believe me, read my oldest blog posts.....) I really thought that the failed project would have a bigger impact on me. Let's see how long I can keep this positivity up..
By the way, I'm working on updating my web site too, only I had to rebuild it in Dreamweaver (which I've never used before) so it's a little harder than expected. But I'm almost finished so watch out for it in the coming weeks!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Update!
It's been almost 2 months since my last post so I guess I owe you an update. I already mentioned I wasn't accepted into the Academy (boohoo) but I was accepted into another art school (yay) that's pretty much at the same level as the one I used to go to but with a whole different system and teaching methods. So I'm officially going back to being an art student!
In the last week of June and first week of July I was in Florence, Italy and it was just great. Not only is there art all around you; famous paintings inside the churches, great architecture, and of course the Uffizi (which was overbooked though so we didn't get to go), but we also saw some exhibitions of more modern, contemporary art. One of the last days of the trip we went to Siena and in the middle of the busy, tourist-crowded street there was a tiny gallery and one of the artists in particular appealed to me: Her name is Antonella Cinelli, and her paintings are very inspired by photos - both in terms of composition and technique - and the motives of her paintings for that exhibition were focused around femininity: Shoes, underwear, make-up, and portraits of women (possibly herself?) doing everyday activities such as putting on socks or pulling up her pantyhose. I guess you have to see it yourself to understand why it's interesting. The series/exhibition was called "Femminile, singolare...concreto".
The trip to Italy also inspired me to take my own photos as a source of inspiration to my paintings, instead of using film stills. After I made that decision I started taking a lot of photos of the streets, the people around me, people talking to each other, people waiting for the bus, or just wainting in general.
I've been home for a few weeks now so I've started on some paintings with some of those photos in mind.
I suppose I should have taken one picture of each of them but truth is I'm a little scared right now cause it feels like I have no idea what I'm doing.. and my self confidence is still not back to normal after the application refusals so I don't think I can take much criticism. I'm trying to find a liberating side to not knowing what I'm doing though...turning it into a good thing.
For the past year I've been worrying on and off about losing my technique and ability to draw and paint people (I miss 'croquis' sessions!!).. one of the things I've always struggled with is to draw and paint hands, whenever I try it looks like a big fleshy thing with sausages randomly attached to it. So I invested in this:
It's supposed to make it easier to draw hands. It works to a certain extent; the thumb can't be moved further from the hand than what is seen in the photo, and the fingers are too long. But it's fun, I've filled half a sketching pad with hand drawings already. I've named "him" Han(d)ibal. (it may seem obsessive to name ones art tools but we have a history for it in my family. It started when my sister got a similar wooden doll to draw and we all thought it looked like the Academy Award statue so it was named Oscar.)
That's about all at the moment, will add the two latest paintings (those I did before the ones I'm working on now) to the web site shortly.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
...."Untitled"
(It sounds very posh considering it's just a roundabout way of saying you can't think of a title..)
Fact is I haven't been very active in terms of art lately. After having received three letters of refusal from art academies in just as many days, I sank into that famous deep black hole for a few days. I thought about giving up - there's nothing as nerve-wrecking as putting your life on hold like this and not even knowing whether it will ever be worth it or if you're just wasting precious years of your life. So my self confidence is currently just starting to emerge from a mud-pool of self pity, and there's no telling if it'll go right down again tomorrow.. so I'm clinging to the idea that I'll make it somehow and someday, it'll just be another year or so. It's not easy.
Because of that I haven't been very productive, but yesterday I tried to make an effort to start painting again and came up with this:
What was I thinking? I'm just coming out of a creative drought (or depression) and so I try to paint two paintings at once. Integrated into each other... I have no idea how this will turn out but I have to say I'd be sad if I work long and hard on this project and it ends in disaster - A painting that's been overdone and with too many layers of paint, or in general something I'd be embarassed to associate my name with (That actually happens a lot).
I did finish a painting about a month ago that I'm sort of pleased with but haven't come round to uploading it to the web site yet - just give me a few days!
Fact is I haven't been very active in terms of art lately. After having received three letters of refusal from art academies in just as many days, I sank into that famous deep black hole for a few days. I thought about giving up - there's nothing as nerve-wrecking as putting your life on hold like this and not even knowing whether it will ever be worth it or if you're just wasting precious years of your life. So my self confidence is currently just starting to emerge from a mud-pool of self pity, and there's no telling if it'll go right down again tomorrow.. so I'm clinging to the idea that I'll make it somehow and someday, it'll just be another year or so. It's not easy.
Because of that I haven't been very productive, but yesterday I tried to make an effort to start painting again and came up with this:
What was I thinking? I'm just coming out of a creative drought (or depression) and so I try to paint two paintings at once. Integrated into each other... I have no idea how this will turn out but I have to say I'd be sad if I work long and hard on this project and it ends in disaster - A painting that's been overdone and with too many layers of paint, or in general something I'd be embarassed to associate my name with (That actually happens a lot).
I did finish a painting about a month ago that I'm sort of pleased with but haven't come round to uploading it to the web site yet - just give me a few days!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Not AGAIN...!
It seems I can't use GoLive to update my web site anymore.. The alternative is Dreamweaver and I have no idea how it works. (I tried and suddenly it had made a Dreamweaver site folder of all my web sites into one...) So I'm very embarassed to say, sorry for not updating the web site in a while, AGAIN. I get the feeling I say that a lot. I have applications for two more schools to finish and I'll try to figure out what to do with the web site(s) after that.
That said, I started a new painting yesterday, it's going to be part of a series of two paintings so it doesn't look very impressive on its own:
That said, I started a new painting yesterday, it's going to be part of a series of two paintings so it doesn't look very impressive on its own:
It was a good opportunity to test my new digital camera though. I was never really happy with the old one, especially when I was going to take photos of my works for documentation, so it was a nice change. It has a so-called "intelligent" flash, which I think is great.
I just realised that the person in the painting looks a lot like my sister, even though it's not. Strange.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Why is it that....
...a painting always looks like CRAP when you first start working on it??
I was always told that the process is just as valuable as the result, but it's very tempting to skip right to the result when you think you've done a day's decent work and realize you've merely created something that looks like a kindergarten project. Maybe that's why it's so hard to "admit" that this is what my new painting looks like. I did have a great time taking the newest addition to my paint brush collection for a test ride though. (as shown to the right) It's a real beaut and probable the most expensive paint brush I've ever owned.
By the way, as you've probably noticed, my web site is now up again. Feel free to leave comments and write in the guestbook; I'm thankful for any feedback.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
A nearly finished self portrait
Just needs a few adjustments.
It's gonna feel so good to not see a copy of my own face staring back at me first thing in the morning!
Friday, January 25, 2008
It's that time of the year again! (yikes)
I guess you thought I'd disappeared for good; I haven't posted for almost a year. I'll try to make more of an effort from now on though. I've been busy painting and trying to build up a portfolio in time for the application season, which is only about a month away. It sounds easy, doesn't it.
It's not, trust me. I can be working on a painting for weeks until it's nearly finished, "it just needs a liiiittle more..." and then I end up doing something horribly which seemed like a good idea at the time, but does in fact ruin the whole painting and I have to start all over again. It's something I have to get used to, I do recognize that, but it's getting harder to take since I'm not officially an art student anymore. Since I wasn't accepted to the Academy and there were too many applicants for the one year course in art history, I signed up for a one year course in religion studies instead.
It's been fascinating so far; a lot of the lectures include information that can be useful in a lot of situations and that also has a relation to art (ethics, philosophy, ancient Greece). The hard part is to juggle my studies with my painting - I feel like I must be 100% commited to both things. If i'm in a hyper-creative phase I tend to miss lectures, and I don't know if I should feel bad or accept that it's a necessary consequence.
Oh, and you've probably noticed that my web site has been taken down. Don't worry, it's only temporarily. I'm working on a new site with a more 'professional' approach which will hopefully give the site a bit more credibility.
Which brings me to another subject (I'm rambling). The decision of making a new web site was made partly by the response I got when I posted a link at a message board in which I'm an active member. It seems that people who have no experience in art (and may be more fascinated by art than actually interested in it) immediately favoured the one painting I was embarassed to have uploaded in the first place - the snow landscape with the descending sun. My sister, who has a genuine interest and also experience in art, asked me in earnest when she saw it was online, if I'd uploaded it as a joke. My mother compared it to an "etude" - something pleasing to the senses but lacking of depth and expression. The painting is too much of a cliché to be taken seriously - yet it's what 'the people' love.
My question is: Is the definition of being a talented artist to make things look exactly as in reality? That you can draw or paint any person, on command, and make it look exactly like the original? When I was younger, about 11 or 12, I was frequently told I should become and artist, based on my ability to draw a reasonable likeness of Nick Carter from a picture. It gave me a sort of status until I started studying graphic design and was told that my drawing abilites would be of less use - The emphasis was on the creative prosess; inventiveness, the ability to let go of the boundaries in one's head. When I started studying art for real, there was of course a great focus on learning the technique; anatomy, colours, mediums, but gradually we were also taught the importance of using art as a tool of expression. Dare to be curious, raise questions, discover unexpected things in the routines of everyday life. I've embraced this philosophy and try my best to live by it - to always work with that theory in mind.
What then if I create a series of paintings that really express my thoughts and feelings on a certain subject, but don't fit into "the man in the street's" perception of what good art should be? Will people have to be educated art critics in order to find any meaning or beauty in my works; is the ordinary man's perception of beauty a certain formula that can't be changed?
Maybe it boils down to the fact that we're afraid of things we don't understand. If a painting doesn't meet our expectations in terms of what good art should be - obviously something that involves shapes and colours that can easily be interpreted by our eyes and thus gives us some kind of meaning - we don't understand it and it is "not good".
I begin to realize I could go on and on about this but I'll spare you for that. Feel free to carry on the debate by commenting.
In closing, and completely off topic, I recommend iTunes/iPod users to subscribe to Tate's Podcast series "TateShots". It's brilliant and includes interviews with artists, special news stories and exhibition previews.
It's not, trust me. I can be working on a painting for weeks until it's nearly finished, "it just needs a liiiittle more..." and then I end up doing something horribly which seemed like a good idea at the time, but does in fact ruin the whole painting and I have to start all over again. It's something I have to get used to, I do recognize that, but it's getting harder to take since I'm not officially an art student anymore. Since I wasn't accepted to the Academy and there were too many applicants for the one year course in art history, I signed up for a one year course in religion studies instead.
It's been fascinating so far; a lot of the lectures include information that can be useful in a lot of situations and that also has a relation to art (ethics, philosophy, ancient Greece). The hard part is to juggle my studies with my painting - I feel like I must be 100% commited to both things. If i'm in a hyper-creative phase I tend to miss lectures, and I don't know if I should feel bad or accept that it's a necessary consequence.
Oh, and you've probably noticed that my web site has been taken down. Don't worry, it's only temporarily. I'm working on a new site with a more 'professional' approach which will hopefully give the site a bit more credibility.
Which brings me to another subject (I'm rambling). The decision of making a new web site was made partly by the response I got when I posted a link at a message board in which I'm an active member. It seems that people who have no experience in art (and may be more fascinated by art than actually interested in it) immediately favoured the one painting I was embarassed to have uploaded in the first place - the snow landscape with the descending sun. My sister, who has a genuine interest and also experience in art, asked me in earnest when she saw it was online, if I'd uploaded it as a joke. My mother compared it to an "etude" - something pleasing to the senses but lacking of depth and expression. The painting is too much of a cliché to be taken seriously - yet it's what 'the people' love.
My question is: Is the definition of being a talented artist to make things look exactly as in reality? That you can draw or paint any person, on command, and make it look exactly like the original? When I was younger, about 11 or 12, I was frequently told I should become and artist, based on my ability to draw a reasonable likeness of Nick Carter from a picture. It gave me a sort of status until I started studying graphic design and was told that my drawing abilites would be of less use - The emphasis was on the creative prosess; inventiveness, the ability to let go of the boundaries in one's head. When I started studying art for real, there was of course a great focus on learning the technique; anatomy, colours, mediums, but gradually we were also taught the importance of using art as a tool of expression. Dare to be curious, raise questions, discover unexpected things in the routines of everyday life. I've embraced this philosophy and try my best to live by it - to always work with that theory in mind.
What then if I create a series of paintings that really express my thoughts and feelings on a certain subject, but don't fit into "the man in the street's" perception of what good art should be? Will people have to be educated art critics in order to find any meaning or beauty in my works; is the ordinary man's perception of beauty a certain formula that can't be changed?
Maybe it boils down to the fact that we're afraid of things we don't understand. If a painting doesn't meet our expectations in terms of what good art should be - obviously something that involves shapes and colours that can easily be interpreted by our eyes and thus gives us some kind of meaning - we don't understand it and it is "not good".
I begin to realize I could go on and on about this but I'll spare you for that. Feel free to carry on the debate by commenting.
In closing, and completely off topic, I recommend iTunes/iPod users to subscribe to Tate's Podcast series "TateShots". It's brilliant and includes interviews with artists, special news stories and exhibition previews.
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